


Put it on the back burner

by uselesscreature



Category: Raya and the Last Dragon (2021)
Genre: Drinking, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, Namaari is Vietnamese, Raya is Filipino, SO MUCH BANTER, SOOO much flriting, but they have different love languages, mature because it might get spicy later, namaari likes raya, namaari: okay me first. r u gay?, raya also like namaari, raya: lets play 20 questions!, sisu and virana are the best wing women, sooo much fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-13 00:33:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,571
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29892921
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uselesscreature/pseuds/uselesscreature
Summary: See, Namaari is strong. Namaari is defiant. Namaari can look deep into the pits of death’s eyes, bare her fangs, and spit at their feet. She’s brave, tactical, smart, resilient – Namaari burns hotter than wildfire, engulfing anyone in her path.But Raya moves like the river – stunning under the sun and still under the moonlight.And if Namaari had to choose between burning and drowning, she would much rather choose the latter.
Relationships: Namaari/Raya (Disney)
Comments: 91
Kudos: 609





	1. seven moons

**Author's Note:**

> Howdy. This is gonna update once a week. Cheers <3
> 
> Due to certain characters not having names or just me forgetting their names, they will be given temporary names until further notice. :p  
> Also, just a reminder, in this fic Raya is Filipino. Namaari is Vietnamese.
> 
> Dep la - strangely pretty  
> Cho chet - goddamn it  
> Sinta - sweetheart/the sound my heart sings

The sun strikes down from the sky, holding itself high over the horizon. The season of sun bears heavily on everyone’s shoulders. There aren’t too many clouds up there, and there hasn’t been a hint of rain the past two days either. Yes, they could ask the dragons for a light sprinkle, but it’s only fair for the fire dragons to thrive in the season they should.

Many of her people in Fang stuck close to the shade, fanning themselves with whatever they could use to keep themselves cool. Namaari envied them to some degree. How she _wishes_ she could stand in the shade and throw a bucket of water from the canals over her head. She wishes she could relax, wishes she could shed her shirt and take a cool bath.

It’s not that she _can’t_ keep the sun off of her skin, but it’s more that she _won’t_ lose this fight just because of heat.

Namaari swiped the back of her hand over tightened brows, skin glistening with sweat. Her breathing is hot, heavy, and she could barely stop her eyes from rolling to the back of her head from the sizzling heat. Even the spear she held felt almost too hot to touch. Blisters are sure to come once this session is over, but she’s much too stubborn to stop now. Especially not when her foe looks just as – if not, more than – sick of standing under the sun’s watchful eye.

“Namaari,” her rival speaks out of breath “c-can we just stop? I’m dying here.”

Namaari manages to chuckle at the attempt to call a draw.

Her eyes refocus themselves on the sound of Raya’s voice. She stood a few feet away from Namaari, her sword – or, Namaari should say, Chief Benja’s sword – trembles at the tip. Namaari’s sure that Raya’s not shaking from fear, but exhaustion will eventually wear out even the best of fighters. Raya’s dark eyes never lost their spark, though. She still looks at Namaari with that same, even temper, something Namaari finds herself lost in more times than she can count.

“Raya, if y-you were scared of losing to m-me,” she brushes a thumb over her chapped lips, “you should’ve just said something.”

Raya manages a smile, and Namaari doesn’t miss how quickly Raya steadied her tremble. “How are you _this_ hardheaded, undercut?”

Namaari tightens her grip on her spear at the ready. “Thank my mother.”

Her words are the only warning Raya receives before Namaari lunges forward. Their weapons don’t clash the way Namaari expected them to. Instead, Raya takes a step to the side before raising her weapon to strike Namaari’s hip. Smart, but Raya’s hesitation causes her usual agility to waver enough for Namari to raise the bottom side of her spear to block, and for her foot to land a kick that sends Raya tumbling down.

Raya wastes no time catching her breath. She jumps back to her feet and moves to the offensive.

Kumandra reunited seven moons ago, and one of their first attempts at becoming diplomatic friends had been to spar by the stone bridge in Heart. Onlookers had stopped to watch their fearsome fight. Some of the dragons even hovered over them, dancing along to each of their movements.

This went on, and on, and on. A week would pass, and it’s back to sparring for the two princesses. At first, Namaari kept count… Raya won, Namaari won, Namaari won, Raya won… but there had been a moment where the time she spent with Raya became more important than winning.

And she thinks Raya might feel the same.

Raya’s back hits the ground, loud enough that even Namaari couldn’t help but wince. She approaches the young woman, breathing heavily as she looms over her. “Raya, are you – _woah!”_

Suddenly, it’s Namaari on the ground with Raya’s hand pressing down on one of her shoulders and a sword tipped on the other one. Raya’s hair tickles Namaari’s red cheek –

Red from the sun? Red from the exhaustion?

Both?

Neither?

It didn’t matter to her. All she could see was the gleaming smile of victory on Raya’s face, and all she could feel was the sudden coolness on her skin as Raya’s silhouette blocked Namaari from the sun’s punishment.

“G…gotcha,” Raya breathed heavily.

“Cheater. Y… you were already down,” Namaari heaves, licking her lips.

“You sh…ouldn’t have let your… guard d-down like that,” Raya coughs a little.

“Didn’t think you had it in you to fake it w…when you’re down...”

Raya actually laughs. “You… can thank my dad for that.”

Namaari couldn’t stop her own laugh, and it burns her lungs. She playfully shoves Raya off of her, and Raya slumps against the ground, belly up, right next to Namaari. Both girls let the silence linger between them as they did their best to catch their breath. The sun eventually reminds Namaari of their exposed position, and she rolls to her side, pushing herself back up on buckling knees.

A grunt left Raya’s lips when Namaari slapped the side of her arm.

“Get up,” she makes sure her voice is gentler and less stern, “I don’t want you baking off in the sun any more than you should be.”

Just as Raya took Namaari’s hand, she chuckles. “Aww, look at you being all nice to me. While you’re at it, can you get me something to drin—” Namaari is quick to let her go, causing Raya to fall back down on her back. “ _Ouch!_ Hey!”

“Shouldn’t have been smart with that mouth of yours,” Namaari sneered as she bent down to pick up her spear. She turns her back from Raya, who’s laugh is a little more than infectious.

“I’m not being smart. You just take everything I say too seriously.” She hears Raya say, and it’s enough for Namaari to roll her eyes and turn around. Raya’s leaning her weight against her elbows, her skin glowing under the sunlight. “Honestly, it’s like you have a thorn on your side all the time. There’s nothing to worry about with the Druuns gone and the dragons back. You’re allowed to relax.”

“First of all,” Namaari twirls her spear, settling it on the expanse of her shoulders and neck; both hands hang over it to keep it in place, “ _you_ are the only thorn on my side as of now, because that diplomatic personality of yours is starting to annoy me.” Raya nods as if to agree. “Second of all, if the Druuns could come back twice, what’s to stop them from returning for the third time? If someone were to break that orb like I had in the past then –”

Raya gives her a knowing look, and Namaari bites her lip.

They had a discussion about this. Well, no… they had an argument. A sparring argument about Namaari’s constant self-deprecation that Raya fully called her out on. They find out that sparring is the only way for Namaari to lower her emotional guard in favor of her physical one, so talking while swinging weapons at each other seems to be the right way to go about it.

Namaari wins the match that day, but Raya wins the argument.

“We have to keep alert,” Namaari quickly corrects herself.

Raya sighs. She pushes herself off of the ground, scooping up her sword in the process. Dirt stuck to her hair and her skin, and despite all this, Namaari can’t help but give Raya a once over – just a quick look over her skin make sure there’s nothing besides the usual scratches and bruises.

Just to make sure.

Definitely just to make sure.

“Liar.” The way Raya whispers the word makes Namaari tense. Raya brushes past Namaari, ducking slightly to avoid the length of the spear. “Besides the Druuns, you’ve been too focused on Fang’s expansion project.”

“Yes, that.” Namaari mutters as she moves her hand to keep the spear to her hip. “It’s a lot of work, but I’m doing what I can to help out.”

“Cute, _but_ ,” Raya stops right in front of Namaari, and Namaari skids to a halt. “You need to make more time for yourself. And no, sparring doesn’t count. I’m talking about actually relaxing for once.”

Namaari huffs. “I know how to relax.”

“Oh yeah?” Raya crosses her arms.

Namaari _hates_ the dangerous smile that crosses Raya’s lips. It stirred a fire in the back of her mind – not quite a challenge but not quite playful either. Namaari scowls as she moves to tuck her hair behind her ear. “I drink tea… and… a-and listen to music.”

Raya shakes her head. “What was the longest time you’ve gone without anyone bothering you?”

“… Twenty minutes?”

“What were you doing?”

“Taking a shower.”

“ _Dep la._ ”

“That’s not bad,” Namaari quips.

“Yeah, see, I’m going to have to disagree with you on that one.”

“ _Enough_ , I don’t want to be lectured –”

“Hey, wait, hold on,” Raya stops Namaari by the shoulders, effectively keeping her from walking away. What’s horrible is that it works like a charm, and Raya knows that. This isn’t the first time Raya has stopped Namaari in her tracks like this, and the first time had been Raya taking her hand and telling her to be patient. “What about the Passing Moon Festival?”

The Passing Moon Festival…

Hosted by a different land each season, the festival serves as the people’s gratitude to the dragons, as thanks for their continuous blessings and bounties. The festival starts with one Land offering the dragon orb to the other, and the other passing it on three moons later to the next Land. The festival is often crowded, but by the high moon, most of the crowds have gone back to their respective land. By dusk, a dance ensues, and whoever’s left in the celebration dances until dawn breaks through the horizon.

Namaari had never stayed long enough to dance. The Land of Fang hadn’t hosted the festival, and Namaari often called the night early much to her friends’ dismay.

But this season is Fang’s turn.

“Yes, I’ve been busy making sure everything is in order,” Namaari nods.

Raya’s brows knitted together, and a sad smile pulls the corners of her lips. “It’s two more moons away.”

“It’s _only_ two more moons away.”

“Namaari, it won’t hurt to take a break. Come ooon,” Raya rolls her eyes, “Boun misses you, Tong misses arm wrestling with you, Noi misses you – and it’s _shocking_ how good you are with kids, by the way. Don’t know if I ever told you that.”

“I’ve got a busy day today. Plan something in advance –”

“It doesn’t have to be all of them. We could just spend time with one other person.”

“ _We_?” Namaari feels her throat rumble in impatience.

“Yes, _we_.” Raya crosses her arms, her face hardening.

Namaari doesn’t budge. She’s standing by the edge, but she will not fall. She refuses to fall. There’s far too much that she needs to focus on other than herself, and a good leader never focuses on themselves… She opens her mouth to reject the offer until Raya tilts her head and softens her features. Is she pouting? She has to be pouting…

“Sisu misses you.”

And Namaari is suddenly careening off the edge.

“ _Raya –”_

“I’m just saying!” She says too quickly, pulling her arms off from Namaari and holding them up. “You’re a really good swimmer, and she likes swimming with you. She also likes how honest you are.”

Namaari opens her mouth, then closes it.

She opens it again, but she groans and closes it.

This little _field mouse_. A pest. A nuisance. An annoying, diplomatic, haggling princess, who’s smiling from ear to ear because she _knows_ she already won Namaari over.

“ _Cho chet_ , Raya, Fine!” Namaari growls, cheeks turning red all over again from embarrassment. “ _Fine!_ ”

“Great!” _Nope, this is far from great,_ Namaari thinks as she marches past Raya, who doesn’t buff over her cold reaction “Think you’ll be ready in an hour then?”

“Make it two. I need to clean up and get the stench of the sun off of me,” Namaari speaks loudly over her shoulder.

She doesn’t need to turn around to know that Raya’s _definitely_ beaming brighter than the sun right now, and she doesn’t really know why, but her lips lift ever so slightly at the thought of it.

She likes Raya.

She thinks as she feels the cool water against her skin.

It takes a harrowing amount of time for anyone to get close to Namaari but by their second month of talking to each other and sparring, Namaari finds herself gravitating towards Raya. Maybe it’s because of her fearlessness. Maybe it’s because her mildly cautious personality works well with Namaari’s calculating one. Maybe it’s because she – after saving Kumandra – made the time to actually open Namaari up little by little.

Maybe it’s all of that mixed together.

Either way, Namaari’s grown used to her company.

She likes it. She likes her. She definitely likes the playfulness of their friendship as well. Bantering is a spectacle; so is working together. Namaari’s cool retorts are enough to keep Raya on her toes, and Raya’s challenging tone is enough to keep up with Namaari’s sharp tongue.

She meets Raya at least once a week. Twice, if they’re lucky. With Raya’s new task being the Heart Land’s courier, she’s been running – rolling, rather – around from one land to another. It takes about a week and a half to round all of Kumandra, so she meets Raya before she leaves and a day after she returns.

They would spar most of the time. In the middle of locked swords, their words would fly out in conversation, trying to catch up with each other as their blades caused sparks to fly in the air.

 _So, how’s Fang doing with repairs?_ A clang, a thud, a grunt.

 _Fine. We’re finishing up the last of it._ A slash, a growl, a wince.

Other times, they would sit in Namaari’s room and talk about whatever’s on the other’s mind. At first, admittedly, it was Raya carrying most of the conversation. At some point, Namaari lets her walls down enough for the other princess to look over it.

 _So, when is your birthday?_ She remembers Raya asking as she plucked a book from one of Namaari’s shelves.

 _The beginning of monsoon. Yours?_ Namaari had answered her as she worked to remove the jewelry on her ear.

_The end of the harvest season._

That’s how Namaari learned that Raya’s birthday had passed.

Namaari learns more about her… little by little. It turns out, Raya’s favorite flowers are orchids. Her favorite color? Red. Favorite season? Whatever’s going on between the dry and the cold season. She has about three different outfits she cycles through; a habit she learns from surviving against the Druuns the past few years. She also likes to listen to the sound of crickets at night since noise is the only thing that helps her sleep nowadays.

One day, Namaari brought Raya to the flower fields in Fang. They had spent almost the entire day just talking to each other that Raya wound up falling asleep on Namaari’s bed in exhaustion; Namaari slept on the farther side of it during the night.

“ _You like that girl, don’t you?”_ Her mother had asked her the next day.

Namaari would rather be turned to stone and shattered to dust than answer that question truthfully.

Namaari sighs, running a dry cloth through her wet hair.

This is her life now, she supposes. She can’t complain, it’s not too grueling. Then again, unlike Raya and the others, she didn’t suffer as much as everyone else did when the Druuns attacked. Guilt lingers in her heart. It’s a shadow reaching into the deepest nooks of her mind, reminding her every day of the pain she had inadvertently caused.

Six years.

Six years of fear sent Kumandra into six years of darkness.

She works to slip on her accessories – earrings, arm cuffs, bracelets, and the likes. Namaari takes a tooth comb and brushes her hair neatly to the side, and that’s when she hears a knock on her door.

“Come in,” she says, tone sounding brisk.

Her door opens slowly to a much older woman, dressed in white. Her smile is gentle, loving, and it’s something Namaari takes comfort in. Her walking staff clicks against the ground as she walks, and the sound reverberates through the whole room.

“Ma,” Namaari smiles.

“You and Raya ought to be more careful when you spar,” her mother shakes her head as she opens her arms up for a hug that Namaari molds herself into. “I think that scratch on your arm is new.”

Namaari glances on her left arm before she checks her right to see a slight scratch that ripped its way along her forearm. The bleed is light and contained, and Namaari shrugs the worry of infection off her shoulder. “It’s a good way to alleviate my anxieties, mother.”

Virana laughs. “Yes, but I’m wondering how you two managed to have never scarred one another during the six years of corruption, and here you two are scratching up each other’s skin from sparring.”

“Point.” Namaari shakes her head, “Why are you here, anyway?”

“Ah, well… I’d like your opinion on The Passing Moon Festival.” Her mother speaks as she moves to sit on the edge of Namaari’s bed. “As you know, the dragon orb will fall to our care this season, and we are in charge of keeping every guest entertained… Problem is, with how large the festival will be, I fear that the grounds of our home will not be enough for the masses.”

Namaari hadn’t even thought of that. “We have the canals. Can we do something about that?”

“And clog every port of entry with boats from the other Lands?”

She hums, raising a hand to rub the back of her scalp. She mindlessly paces towards her refreshments sitting by the night table of her room. Pouring a cup into her glass, her eyes glance out of her balcony and into the greenery… the wide, open field once known as the dragons’ graveyard.

Her fingers tap against the glass as her thoughts linked together.

“Mother, what about the graveyard? Or… well, the flower fields?” Namaari nods for her mother to walk over, and as soon as the chief was by her side, Namaari continues. “It’ll be a great place for the festival. Not only that, but the flat fields would be perfect for the fireworks display we’ll have for that night.”

It takes her mother a moment before she’s raising a hand to rest on Namaari’s shoulder. “Clever. I’ll think of it. There’s something else I want to talk to you about.”

“Anything,” Namaari nods her head.

“Are you planning on joining the moonlight dance?”

She snorts. “With who? Besides, I thought you’re supposed to dance with your lover? I highly doubt any of the men or women here are equal to my prowess.”

Virana shakes her head, the jewelry on her ear shining in the sunlight. “How about someone outside of Fang?”

“Would that even be allowed?”

“It has never been done as far as I’m concerned. Perhaps, it has, but I have not seen two people from two different lands dancing together. No.”

Of course, it wouldn’t be. Dancing with someone from another land insinuates romance, love, and affection. The dance itself is said to keep the love between two lovers safe until the next season. Namaari finds it ridiculous how quickly these types of stories spread all through Kumandra, and she finds it even more surprising how many genuinely believe in it.

“It doesn’t matter, either way. It’s not like I’m interested in anyone right now,” Namaari starts drinking her water.

“Are you sure?”

Namaari looks at her mother right in the eyes. Genuine curiosity and slyness danced along those light brown eyes, and it bothers Namaari enough to lower her cup of water. “What are you suggesting?”

One of Virana’s brow rockets upward. “For someone as watchful and observant as you are, dear daughter… I’m shocked you haven’t noticed a certain someone’s pursuit.”

Something about that comment made her feel a little lesser of herself, so Namaari bites her cheek, trying to calm herself. “You haven’t answered my question.”

“I’m talking about R—”

“ _Namaari!_ ”

On instinct, Namaari ducks, and a flash of blue barrels into the room from her window. Whatever it is, crashes into Namaari’s bed with a force strong enough to make the wooden frame click and bend in distress. Namaari is fast to grab the weapon by her hip but when an all too familiar laugh reverberates around the room, her panic is replaced with relief.

Sisu is first to straighten herself out and bounce off of the bed, energy practically moving from the tip of her snout to the end of her tail. Her mane is wild, just like Raya’s, and she looks a little duller than they last saw each other. Despite Sisu’s childishness, Namaari still bows her head. Virana follows suit.

Raya groans in the background from the bed, and Namaari scoffs. She straightens her back with a hand to her hip. “Sisu, it’s good to see you.”

“Ah, yeah! You too, you too!” Pride washes over Namaari every time Sisu greets her like a friend. They _are_ friends… but dragons are a little more important than monarchs, and they are a lot more powerful.

Just standing next to Sisu reminds of her their first meeting, yet it also reminds her of every other meeting after. “It’s good to see _you_ , Chief Virana. Lookin’ finer than wine.” Sisu nods her head.

Virana rolls her eyes but smiles, nonetheless. “Good to see my daughter befriending the right crowd.”

“Someone’s gotta break through that armor of hers,” Raya comments as she joins them, dusting herself off. She wore something different today. A thin garment, sleeveless garment, purple in color, that’s tight around her skin and tucked under her pants. The same old boots, though. She’s a rider after all.

Namaari jabs a finger on Raya’s shoulder. “And _you_ ,” Raya swats her finger away as she says it, “use the door next time.”

“Wh- Wait why are you scolding _me?_ It was Sisu’s idea. Also, why use the door when your window is _always_ wide open?” Raya smirks. “It’s very useful for say, a dragon who wants to see you and a girl who likes spending time with you.”

“I – you –” It’s the easiness of how Raya says it that catches her off guard. Namaari is fast to gather herself. She’s not about to stutter in front of her own _mother_. “I tolerate –” her voice drops to a murmur “— _spending time with you_ –” and then a shout “but _please_ use the door next time.”

“Wow, _still_ lying to ourselves, Namaarri?”

“The only lying that will happen is you lying on the ground, bleeding if you don’t shut up.” There’s a growl in there. Namaari squares her shoulders to add emphasis.

Virana ends this by ruffling her daughter’s head and hitting Namaari’s shin with her walking stick. “I will see you tonight, my little firecracker. Be nice to your friends,” Namaari quickly fixes her hair as her mother walks over to Raya. Her mother’s eyes linger on Raya’s, and there’s not a hint of judgment behind it. “Lovely to see you, wildling. You as well, Sisu.”

Both the dragon and Raya bow their heads in respect.

As soon as the door to Namaari’s room clicks shut, Namaari sighs. Part of her is happy for their interruption. The last thing she wants to talk to her mother about are her personal relationships.

“So, what were the two of you talking about?” Raya asks.

“Just business as usual.”

“Hm… twenty minutes?” Raya touches Namaari’s right arm, a teasing tone on her lips.

Namaari watches her draw her finger along the open wound before looking up and keeping a close eye on Raya. Namaari can’t stop the shiver from the touch of Raya’s finger, but she doesn’t pull her arm away either. “Twenty-five this time, actually,” she manages to whisper.

Pulling out an ointment from her side, Raya dips a finger into the cream before gently touching the damaged seam on Namaari’s skin. “Five minutes better than the last? Huh, and here I thought you tuned me out at that point.”

“I don’t. I never have.” Raya looks up as Namaari says. There’s something… a tension of some sort that Namaari can feel in her stomach. Raya’s lips part slightly at the words. “I always listen. Sometimes, you say the right words and it helps ease my mind.”

Raya holds their gaze before she tilts her head oh so slowly, and Namaari’s heart stops for two beats. “Then maybe you should have me around more.”

“Hmm, that wouldn’t be too bad.”

There’s a laugh that breaks – that _shatters_ – the moment, and then and only then did Namaari pull her arm away from Raya’s hold. She grits her teeth and holds back a frown when she turns towards Sisu, who’s back to laying on Namaari’s bed, tail flicking in delight.

Namaari could see Raya in her peripherals; the princess pulling at the rim of her straw hat and quietly clearing her throat.

“Namaari, I always knew you were close to your mom, but you’re tellin’ me you’ve had the same haircut since you were a kid?” Sisu howls in laughter as she points a claw towards the painting on the wall.

It’s a small portrait of her and her mother, commissioned a long time ago from a traveling artist. Namaari’s eyes were brighter and gentler back then. Six years of hardened battles and regal manners have taught her to keep her emotions proper and controlled.

The lack of control is a sign of weakness, or so she’s told.

Namaari shakes her head.

“I looked up to my mother so much that I wanted her hairstyle, but I started changing my mind along the way,” Namaari crosses her arms, “but I was also too impatient to wait for my hair to grow back, so… we’re stuck with this.”

“It makes ya’ look like a bad, warrior queen, I tell you that much,” Sisu tells her as she approaches them. “Now come on, there’s a spot I wanna’ show you two. It’s deep in the Land of Heart, but I’m sure you’ll both like it.”

Namaari smiles, turning to Raya. “Are you taking Tuk tuk?”

Raya nods, “Yes, he’s waiting outside.”

“Good. I’ll take Nyara. Sisu, lead the way?”

“Sure thing boss,” Sisu doesn’t hesitate to throw herself out the window and glide around the sky.

Once she’s out of sight, Namaari almost falls over when Raya bumps their shoulders together. “Race you down the steps? Loser gets to buy everyone congee?”

There’s a hint of mischievousness on Raya’s tongue. Something about it stirs a more playful spirit inside Namaari. Namaari leans towards Raya’s ear, close enough for her breath to tickle her. Raya doesn’t move. She never moves.

For Namaari, lithe hands on her shoulder or a gentle tug on her hand is enough to keep her in place. For Raya, it’s getting a little too close to her face.

And Namaari takes advantage of that.

“You’re on, _sinta_ ,” she challenges before shoving Raya hard enough to cause her to fall over.

Namaari hears the words ‘cheater’ as soon as she bolts out of the door.


	2. i do adore you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> always remember to kudos, sub, and comment at the end folks <3
> 
> also i know i said a week, but i jjust remembered im literally moving in like..... two weeks, so yall get the advance LMAO. Next update is three days from now.
> 
> Happy reading

It started about four moons ago.

Raya didn’t expect anything different from meeting Namaari that day. They would almost always spar for an hour or two before eating a meal in the middle of catching up. Raya had already felt that familiar stir in her heart by this point. It’s the same tiny little tug she felt when they had first met as kids.

Namaari looked distant in thought. Her eyes had been a little duller than sharp, and Raya had been quick to point it out. Sleep evades her, Namaari confessed. And Raya, being Raya, did her best to help Namaari with whatever advice she could give.

Raya advised her to get night berries to help her sleep, but Namaari’s grown to tolerate its temporary fatiguing effects.

Raya tried burning her energy out through the day to help her catch sleep, but Namaari is _impossible_ to tire out.

At some point, Raya asked her if there had been a place that would give Namaari peace.

The next thing Raya realized is that they are taking a stroll through the flower fields, watching the sunset together. Then, and only then, did Namaari appear at ease. The muscles on her back didn’t twitch at every sound, her hand never touched the hilt of her blade or her crossbow, and her features looked softer under the night’s glow.

Raya had lain her head on Namaari’s lap, and Namaari’s hand busied themselves with braiding little flowers into Raya’s hair.

 _Thank you,_ Raya can’t forget how small Namaari sounded at that moment, _I appreciate what you’ve done._

Seven words.

Seven words are all it took for Raya to realize that at that moment if Namaari were to ask Raya to burn down a village, she might just do it.

Raya likes Namaari. She likes Namaari in an ‘everything she does makes my heart flutter’ kind of way.

Maybe she always did.

Maybe the difference now is that they’re older, and Raya understands what _these certain feelings_ entail.

She hides it well enough to not make a fool out of herself, but Namaari is good at complimenting and that’s about the only time Raya visibly stumbles.

Namaari is just about the opposite, however.

When feelings are brought to the table, Namarri stands up, pushes her chair in, and walks out of the room, effectively leaving before she makes a fool of herself. Raya’s the kind who sits in her chair and tries her best despite being uncomfortable, but one question, in particular, is all it takes to ripple through her like a rock in still-water.

Namaari runs from it with dignity intact, and Raya stays despite the risk.

Raya is honest when she can, and Namaari lies to protect.

And it’s never the bad kind of lying, Raya learns that specific information fairly quickly. She lies by redirecting the topic, she lies by telling half a truth, and she lies when she’s put in a situation she can’t run from. Defenses shooting up from left and right, but they’re never meant to hurt someone.

It's simply to hide her true emotions.

Thing is, when Namaari tells the truth, it’s written all over her face.

The way her brow quirks upward, the way she tucks her hair behind her ear, the way she practically gives away just how much she cares in a sliver of a second. If one blinks, one will miss it. She’s like a cat, really.

Raya’s learned to maneuver every wall around Namaari’s heart. It’s a warm-up at this point.

Raya watches Sisu and Namaari from afar; Namaari laughing as she lunges after Sisu for throwing water at her face. Raya would join them, but she’s got time to spend with Sisu the next day. Namaari, on the other hand, is working around a busy schedule.

Besides, it’s a good excuse to sit by the forest, under the protective shade of a tall narra tree.

She likes Kumandra, but when it’s hot it’s _hot_. She can’t imagine what Tail is like right now. The sand must feel like stepping on a frying pan full of oil.

The spot Sisu shows them is… well, beyond beautiful. Trees circle around the small lake, reaching up towards the sky, leaving the water untouched and cool. There’s a bigger tree sitting in the middle of the water, standing a little shorter than the other ones but just as domineering, nonetheless.

Sisu explains to them that a steady stream would connect the lake from the river during the season of rain, but the season of heat would often cause the disconnection.

Namaari is quick to strip away the first layer of her clothes and dive in.

Raya keeps a lead on Tuk tuk and Nyara. The pair of them playing together by the tree lines; Nyara hating bugs and killing them, and Tuk tuk gratefully benefitting from her annoyance.

“So,” Raya jumps when she hears Sisu talk. Sisu’s laying by the edge of the water right next to Raya’s feet, “when are you planning to tell Namaari you like her?”

“ _Sisu!_ ” Raya scolds her, looking around the surface of the lake for Namaari.

“Aww, don’t worry about her. She’s under the water, swimming around like a fish,” Sisu shakes the water off of her mane. “You should go for her. You two already fight like a married couple, so you’ve got that part down. You’ve already got your pets bonding together, so you have that going or you too. Pretty sure Chief Virana’s ready for it to happen,” she lists down with each dragon claw, “you’ve had that whole friends to enemies arc, so why not go for lovers next, eh?”

Is it illegal to hit a dragon?

Raya buries her face into her hands and groans. “I shouldn’t have told you.”

Sisu snickers, “Yeah, well ya’ did and now I’m going to be the best wing woman.”

To be fair to herself, she didn’t technically _tell_ Sisu. Sisu just managed to put two and two together when she overheard Raya pacing around her room, trying to make sense of her feelings for Namaari and how ‘sharing a drink from the same cup’ isn’t an actual kiss.

And when Raya reminded herself that she doesn’t even know how pursuing someone works, Sisu’s howling laughter from outside her window gave the dragon’s position away.

“If you ask me, you’re wasting time sittin’ here, doing nothing as you watch those muscles of hers work—"

Raya’s cheeks _burn_ , “You—"

“I’m just sayin’,” The water dragon points her claw over a direction, “what’re you gonna’ if someone else sweeps _her_ off the market?”

Just then, Namaari bursts out of the water in the area Sisu had thrust her talon to, and Raya’s mouth closes shut.

Raya had seen plenty of attractive men and women in her life. The women mostly caught her attention, but Raya’s always given them a stiff arm when it comes to romance. The main reason being the Druun and saving her father, and the other being the fact that this was all new to her… But Namaari…

Whether it happened in good timing, or it had always been there from the beginning? It’s hard to figure out.

But _Namaari…_

Namaari is… _very_ handsome.

As Namaari rises from the water, each droplet bending to the shape of her muscles. Namaari wades to the edge where Sisu and Raya’s at, her body rising out of the water inch by inch. And right before Namaari’s close enough to hear them, Sisu snickers into Raya’s ear. “By the way, you can thank me later.”

“W-wait what?”

“Hey, Namaari!” Sisu calls out, “I forgot my brother Jagan needs me to head to Talon for a little pick me up. Sorry to bail, but I should probably head out.”

No, but really. Is it _actually_ written law that hitting a dragon is illegal?

Namaari looks unbothered by it, but she does quirk her brow as she fully steps out of the lake. Sisu takes a second to at least help the princess out. With a flick of her claw, water peels off of Namaari’s skin and clothes, leaving princess undercut as dry as she once was before jumping into the lake.

“How kind of you,” Namaari dips her head.

“Of course, of course! We should do this more sometimes! Despite losing to me every time we race, I really like that strong will. Really, I do,” Sisu tells her as she hands the young princess her boots and trousers. “And I can even tell you, you’ve gotten so much faster at swimming!”

Namaari gives Sisu a gentle look as she tucks her hair behind her ear. “I have a good teacher.”

“Annnd, this teacher needs to take her leave for dear old sister!”

Raya really tries not to react to that slip-up. Namaari, however, is very fast to catch on to it. “I thought you were going to Talon for your brother?”

“O-oh, yeah! Yeah, for my brother Pengu.”

Strike two. “You mean Jagan?”

“ _Yes!_ Jagan! Anyway! I should go, you two ah… keep your uh, heads on straight… or, or uh, don’t?” Sisu clicks her claws together nervously.

Strike three.

Before another word could be said, Sisu bounces through the air, leaving the two princesses to themselves.

Namaari turns her head. “Of all the dragons to save the world… _her_?”

Raya fails to stop herself from chuckling. “Hey, be nice. It could’ve been worse.”

She stops herself when she hears Namaari struggling to pull up her loose breeches. There was no way to stop her eyes from wandering over to where Namaari stood. The Fang princess had her undergarments on top, and a leather belt, pants, and riding boots on the bottom. Raya risks a glance or two until Namaari eventually catches her in the act.

Raya watched the way the sun danced in her light brown eyes, turning it amber.

Raya doesn’t look away. Instead, she smiles and shrugs. “The dragon we met could have been as grumpy as you. Then, I think, Kumandra would’ve burned to the ground.”

Namaari shakes her head as she picks up her discarded shirt from the ground. “Praise the dragons, we got stuck with someone just as childish as you are.”

 _Ouch_. Raya leans back on her arms as Namaari finishes up with getting dressed. “And somehow _you_ got stuck with both of us. So, stay bitter about it, princess.”

The loose laugh that slides out of Namaari’s lips resonates around the forest.

Here’s another thing about Namaari. Their friendship is littered with comfortable silences.

It was odd at first, since Raya isn’t much of a fan of prolonged silence, but after a little poking around, she finds out that Namaari is just as uncomfortable with it. Something about not knowing whether or not the snap of twigs in the forest are Druuns or humans from other Lands who are out to get them. Raya’s discomfort with silence stems from several years of being alone, whilst Namaari’s stems from fear.

Namaari falls into silence around Raya, however.

 _If I talk every second I’m with you,_ Namaari explains, _then that only means I’m not comfortable enough to let the silence linger between us._

The silence lasts for a few minutes. Namaari taking up the empty space next to Raya as they watch the sun begin to set.

“Hm, well, if we’re really going to be technical about it,” Raya sings, “the grumpy one _was_ the one who saved us.”

Namaari’s lips tug to a sad smile. “You forget that she’s also the reason it happened in the first place. She betrayed you – ”

“ – and learned her lesson,” Raya adds, opting to completely lean her head against Namaari’s shoulder in an attempt to stop that stubborn head of hers from thinking any deeper, “she also brings up her regrets all the time, and I’m personally offended that she’d think I still blame her for all of it.”

There it is. A smile that bared her fangs. One that’s accompanied by the shake of her head and a tuck of her hair. “Maybe it’s her way of apologizing.”

Raya hums, tucking away her own hair before saying anything else. “She already apologized when she turned my hair cuff into a hand cuff.”

Namaari straightens them out then, Raya feeling a little disappointed by the sudden lack of touch; The feeling completely goes away, though, when Namaari takes Raya by the wrist.

Namaari’s admiring the golden, ring-like bracelet that wrapped around Raya’s upper forearm.

Most citizens in Fang are talented in creating their own jewelry. Each adornment marks a specific occasion in the wearer’s life, and each tell a story preserved in metal, stone, gems, and leather. Anything once owned by the parents is melted and turned into something new. Something that would represent their child’s soul but also their parents’ legacy.

The dragon necklace had been Namaari’s father, and before that, Namaari’s grandfather.

It had been a cat before a dragon; it had been an ox before a cat.

Raya feels the difference between her warm skin and Namaari’s cold hands the longer the touch lingers.

“I didn’t want to melt the metal in case you didn’t want me to,” Namaari points out as she draws lines over the leather straps, “you also wear the bands on these a little too tight.”

Raya hides her tiny gasp in a sigh when Namaari suddenly strokes her thumb over her wrists. “I didn’t want it to slip off again.”

Namaari shoots her eyes up from the accessory in favor of looking into Raya’s, hooded from the sun because of her hat. Good, because it hid the way her face burned. “I could have adjusted it for you. Or gotten you softer straps.”

Her voice starts falling into a breath of a whisper right then. “It’s not too tight, it’s…” Raya lowers her eyes to Namaari’s lips for a passing second, “it’s just that I worry about losing it sometimes. I don’t want to lose – ” _you,_ she wanted to say “—it again. So, I keep it like that.”

Namaari trails her finger from the leather to the palm of Raya’s calloused hands. “Perhaps… I should have turned it into a ring then.”

There are these lapses in time where Raya can practically see something fragile lingering in the air between them.

The first moment being the first time Namaari had effectively mounted and pinned Raya during a sparring match. The third had been Raya, slipping her hat on Namaari’s head to protect her from the rain. The sixth had been an accidental brush of each other’s fingers, the eighth had been the time they shared a bed, the thirteenth had been feeding each other food, and the latest being Namaari’s room a few hours earlier.

And now, this.

It’s a thread stretched out so thin that the dullest blade could cut through it as easily as scissor would to paper. She’s told that these moments happen when something in the air is bent out of shape because of the gravity between two people. The weight of it feels like a pressure on the chest and a quiet desire to absolve whatever space is between them.

She feels it.

She knows Namaari feels it too.

Like two opposing forces that work well together.

Raya bites her lip.

“A ring would be nice.”

“Yes,” Namaari says, inching a little closer to Raya’s face. If Namaari hasn’t noticed the blush on Raya’s face at this point, then Raya’s really playing a losing game here. Then, Namari drops her grip around Raya’s hand entirely, teasing, “but you somehow lost the cuff despite being tied tightly around Tuk tuk’s saddle, so I highly doubt that would change anything.”

The tension disappears just like that.

“Pft,” Raya pulls away, “shut up, I was attacked by a Druun.”

“So was I, _dep la_. But did you ever see me losing any of my jewelry? No. I turned to stone with everything intact.”

“Why did you even keep my cuff with you all this time?” Raya curtly retorts.

“Right back at you – why did _you_ keep the dragon necklace I gave you after everything I’ve done?”

Okay, fair. That was a good one.

Raya sighs, looking up at the sky, slowly turning into a darker hue of orange. Sooner or later, it’ll be dark. “I had my reasons,” Raya shrugs, “I’d tell you but it’s getting dark. I wouldn’t want you to travel back with little light.”

Namaari snorts, but she doesn’t press for an answer. Instead, Namaari teases her. “You should relax. You know, a certain someone told me it’s good for you. I’m told you’ll live longer.”

That earned Namaari a playful shove. “Smartass,” Raya chuckles.

“Language.”

Namaari stands up to her feet first, offering Raya a hand to get up. She rises with a soft grunt.

Raya travels with Namaari to the border between their Lands, the pair hugging tightly, knowing damn well that the next time they get to see each other isn’t for another week. Raya holds her a little tighter and a little longer than usual, but Namaari doesn’t react against it. In fact, she sinks a little deeper into it.

They bid their farewells before Raya directs Tuk tuk to the quickest route home.

By the time Raya steps into her house, her father had a plate of food ready on the table. Raya picks a piece of meat with her finger only for her father to swat her.

She recoils.

“You come home hours later than you had promised me, with dirty hands and mud on your boots,” Her father looked at her with the slightest bit of stoic discipline. “Let me guess, Namaari again?”

Raya shrugs, heading towards the pail of water by the table. “She’s the only one I know around my age. Little Noi’s a baby, Tong’s twice my age, Boun is half of it… Sisu is… a relic?” As soon as she has washed her hands, she takes a seat by the table whilst snatching up a piece of tender pork in the process. “Namaari’s fun too when you get to know her a little more.”

Chief Benja scoffs, taking a handful of rice and meat. He compresses it into a triangle with his fingers before shoveling it into his mouth. He chews and swallows before responding. “Speaking of friends, you should spend some time looking closer than farther. You have next three days to yourself to _find people_ in Heart.”

She chuckles. “I befriended Seju.”

“The foreign man who makes liquor for you to smuggle doesn’t count,” her father lectures, “you could go buffalo hunting with Tiyo. There’s a party leaving at the break of dawn. You could join Tai in building weapons, or Maria at the market.”

Something about this isn’t sitting well with Raya.

She slumps back against the chair, tossing a piece of meat into her mouth as she gives her own father a once-over.

Tiyo is a big man whose attention is almost always on whatever he can get his hands on. He’s a hard worker, but he’s a day drinker. After nearly losing his life to the Druun, he spends a good bulk of his time either working or doing whatever made him happy, which is drinking and singing. And… he’s single.

Tai is just as much of a hard worker. He works closely with the dragon soldiers of Heart, creating weapons that are far more advance compared to the other Lands. Tai’s also responsible for creating the traps that once protected the dragon orb. He also happens to be single.

Maria is a whirlwind. A woman who knows her worth and assures that she’s most definitely the finest cook in all five lands. She’s also one of the fiercest personalities in Heart. Everyone knows her by name simply because she’s that well-liked. But she’s also single… with a daughter too.

“Are you trying to marry me off?” Raya’s hands clasp together.

“No.”

_Oh good._

“But I am trying to get you to fall in love with someone.”

_Well, that’s not so good._

“I’ll fall in love when I feel like falling in love, Ba.”

“You haven’t even kissed anyone yet.” Raya turns scarlet at that. How does _he_ know that? “By your age, I had already wed your mother.”

Raya steals another piece of meat, this time pointing it in her father’s direction. “I had _six_ years to fight the Druun and save you! Give me a break!” Raya pops the scrap into her mouth. “You’ve been a rock this _whole_ time!”

Chief Benja winks at her right then and there. “And I haven’t aged a bit.”

“You suck,” Raya laughs. She drums her fingers on the table, asking herself if she’s ready to cross this line. At some point, she decides, chewing the inside of her cheek before starting. “Ba, I umm… have to tell you something –”

“I know.”

“— and it’s about… wait, what?” She can’t help but stare at him in disbelief.

He shovels another triangle of food into his mouth, chewing and then swallowing before speaking again. “That you’re interested in _her_. I know,” his confidence doesn’t reassure Raya, but when he smiles, she sees nothing but understanding. Though, he does look almost pleased with himself.

Raya feels lucky to have him as her father. To have such a kind man. A patient man. She wonders what kind of daughter she would have turned into had he been there for the past six years. She wonders if she could become as wonderful as he is.

Even half of that would be spectacular.

And seeing him approve of Namaari… it’s comforting.

“She’s a rather feisty one, a little hard to figure out, but I’m sure you two understand each other more than anyone else around you. She also helped you save Kumandra, and she even helped you believe in it too,” her father continues, bringing a smile on Raya’s face.

“I’m… really glad you’re okay with this.”

“I mean, I don’t know how it’ll work out, but I’m sure you’ll find a way.”

Raya chuckles. “Well, she’s only the princess of Fang. It shouldn’t be too hard.”

Chief Benja’s face suddenly twists in confusion. “Namaari? What does Namaari have anything to do with this?”

Raya opens her mouth, and a sound comes out just as quickly as it stops. She tries again. “Ba, hold on, who did you think I was talking about?”

Her father looks at her with unblinking eyes. “Why… Sisu, of course. It’s going to be hard with her being a dragon, and she’s a sassy little thing.”

“ _Ba, no!”_

“Wait, were you talking about Namaari?” his voice cracked as he says it, “ _Princess_ Namaari?”

_Was he messing with her?_

“Yes!”

“Didn’t you hate each other? I mean, I know you like fighters, but I didn’t think… is it the fact that she’s about the only one who can beat you in a fight? Or is it her physical attributes like her muscles? Is is the undercut? –" _a mocking gasp_ , “—is this why you call each other _Dep la_ and _Sinta_?”

_Yep. Definitely messing with her._

“ _Leaving!_ I am leaving!” Raya’s standing up before she even says it, “I’m going to bed! Goodnight!”

Her father’s initial silence is deafening, but his boom of laughter as soon as Raya’s door slams shut is enough to cause her to lean and slide against the door, swallowing a spoonful of embarrassment as she did so.

_If you ask me, you’re wasting time sittin’ here, doing nothing…_

Raya sighs.

She looks at her bracelet, a beacon in the darkness of her room, reflecting the moon’s light from outside.

Why _did_ Namaari keep it?

Why did _Raya_ keep it?

She sighs again, thumping her head against the door as quietly as she could. “ _Fuck_ ,” being the only word she could muster up, given the situation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: Rayla  
> My brain: you mean Raya?  
> Me: right, right... Arya.  
> My brain: for fucks sake...
> 
> PS: it also doesnt help that the name I go by is Aya lmao


	3. finer than wine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TWWWWW:::::: DRINKING.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like, comment, and subscribe!!! [laughs in youtuber]
> 
> also i finished writing the story. but am i gonna post it all in one go? hahahaaaaaa no... :))) yall get to wait :)))))
> 
> 3 days for the next chapter folks ✌🏽

Namaari’s list of work as a chiefling overwhelms her sometimes.

Only sometimes. When sleep doesn’t quite catch her in time and she spends another hour or two trying to wrestle her own conscience to bed, she rises the following morning with the most irritable mood. That’s when she calls the day a few hours earlier than usual if she can.

Her mother’s slowly passing over the title of chief to Namaari, letting her handle certain, not too serious meetings with other chiefs or allowing her to visit certain kingdoms for diplomatic reasons. Other times, it’s meager little things like paperwork, infrastructure, food and water, Populi complaints… Namaari’s fine with handling most of these tasks, as boring as they tend to get.

After all, she’s the future chief.

She can’t cherry-pick which duties she must attend to.

If she could, though, Namaari picked the children.

Everything about the children. She’d read to them, tell them a story, play with them around the atrium of the palace. They would bring her little crafts and creations they made themselves, and Namaari would keep it in a trunk by the foot of her bed. She’d carry them like rice bags over her shoulders sometimes, and other times she’d have one kit on each foot, two on each arm, and one sitting around her shoulders.

The children had nicknames – _kits, scamps, rats, little sparrows –_ and the kids would give Namaari her own nicknames – _Nami_ and _Maari_ being the favorite.

Namaari wishes to protect their innocence. So much pain had already happened in the world, and Fang did a good job protecting themselves for the past six years. Their safety had been compromised only at the final second.

Virana did her best to protect the children from the Druun, but questions had to be answered at some point. Once explained to the children, though, they all stood bravely and announced that the ‘brave’ Namaari will protect them. The memory softens her up every single time, but the lasting bitterness over the idea that she had _nearly_ run away from it all after Raya and her friends turned to stone…

Of course, the near mistake doesn’t cripple her. No.

She’s stronger than that.

Namaari keeps it in her memory to remind herself that she can’t hesitate next time; it serves as a lesson.

She has to learn how to trust in people, but she must also learn how to trust in herself the way all of Fang trusts her.

The way Raya trusts her.

Namaari picks up another sheet of paper from her desk. Her eyes are quick to notice a scrap that had slipped out, gliding down, ever so slowly. Gingerly, she picks it up and turns it over.

_If you’ve gone this far, please stand up, get some food, drink some water, and take a break! – Raya._

Namaari shakes her head, a smile threatening to split her stoic face.

Notes are frequent things she would find around her room. Every time Raya visits, Namaari is sure she’ll find four or five notes partially hidden around her room the next day – whether it’s in the pocket of her pants, or the inside of her shoes, or on her balcony.

She obliges to the note.

She heads out of the building, walking down the steps with a pear in hand while her other one rests atop her blade’s hilt. It’s not as hot today. A telltale sign that the season is close to a pass.

There’s only one more week before the Passing Moon Festival, and Namaari could tell that everyone’s working their best to make this festival memorable.

Namaari’s in charge of the placement of things. Food stalls are going to encompass most of the courtyard, and the night market will be by the flower fields. There’s adequate space for people to dance, and eat, and chatter amongst themselves; Namaari made sure of that.

General Atitaya is in charge of the fireworks show and the overall security.

The chief is in charge of the aesthetics around the area and setting up foreign stalls for the other Lands.

Namaari takes a bite out of her pear and rolls her shoulder, stretching out her muscles. Everything seems to be going smoothly, she supposes. It feels like dead weight lifts off of her shoulder… for the meantime, at least.

Who knows what the next season will bring?

“Maari!” She hears a familiar call for her attention.

She purposely turns just a little slower for two young boys to wrap themselves around Namaari’s legs. She gasps loudly, acting shocked so the kids would feel a bit proud of themselves. Namaari bends to pat them both on the head. They look up at her with sad little eyes, but it’s not enough for Namaari to soften up.

“Dao, Chai! What did the chief say about running around the courtyard?” She scolds them gently.

“But we miss playing with you! We ‘aven’t seen you in so long,” Dao tells her as Namaari leans down to pick him up, allowing him to sit on her arm as she leans down to pick up Chai.

Chai nods along with his brother. “Courtyard ish’ closed… Can’t play ball or chase,” he tells Namaari, pointing to the spot the kids would normally play at. It’s closed for the festival.

Namaari hums. “Is that so? Don’t worry, my little kits. The festival will come, and it will be over before you know it. And then, after that, I promise I’ll play ball with you. Where are your Mas anyway?”

“Mama is going to Spine to trade,” Chai tells her, his hands are white from gripping Namaari’s shirt. “She won’ be home’ til moon up.”

“And Ma is at the back,” Dao says more eloquently, “she’s hanging up clothes.”

Namaari walks over with both boys in hand, rounding the little hut that’s just below the steps of her own home. She greets a few people on the way, and they bow to her in respect. Namaari looks on to see General Atitaya herself, wringing wet clothes and hanging them up on a wire to dry. She hears the woman curse to herself when one of the finicky little things fall to the dusty ground.

It’s Namaari’s chuckle that gave her away, and Atitaya is suddenly straightening herself up as she’s trained to do.

She relaxes as soon as she noticed her sons, though.

“I was wondering where my sun and stars ran off to,” Atitaya laughs, taking Chai from Namaari’s arm. Atitaya’s attempts to beckon Dao over is feeble, and Dao simply buries herself further into Namaari’s neck. The two women opt to let the child be. “I hope they didn’t bother you too much?”

A polite smile spread across Namaari’s lips. “Just the opposite. I like having these little monsters around. I’d love to spend time with them, but things have been too busy between the expansion and the festival.”

Atitaya nods, bouncing on her heels to soothe Chai. “It is a lot more peaceful, though, don’t you think?” Her words sound more like a question than a reassurance. “With the Druuns gone and all that, we don’t have to worry too much about that. I get to spend more time with the children.”

“With the Druuns gone, thieves and mercenaries are just going to start coming back up. One evil is just going to replace another.”

That earns Namaari a snort. “Permission to speak freely?”

“You’re not at work at the moment, General, but permission granted.”

“I bet you’re a joy to have at the table, your grace.”

Namaari fails to stop herself from smiling at that. “Haven’t you heard? I’m delightful.”

Atitaya laughs at that. “You remind me of my wife sometimes,” she tells Namaari with glazed eyes. Her hand moves to rub circles on Chai’s back when he muses for attention. “She’s always so serious and straight-faced until I pull a joke right out of my pocket. She’s not much of a talker, but she’s rather good at taking care of people. Just like you, princess.”

She’s met Atitaya’s wife once or twice. A woman named Jing, born with a man from the Spine as her father and a native Fang as a mother. She’s mute. A silent woman who stands taller than the chief and almost bigger than a bull. Her personality, however, is just as gentle as a feather falling from the sky and just as generous as a breeze on a hot day.

These lovers… the pair of them… Namaari had spotted them locked in moonlight dance.

“Remind me Atitaya,” Namaari asks, “how did you and Jing meet?”

A scoff left Atitaya’s lips. “We didn’t really like each other, remember? We were a menace to the chief.”

“That’s right,” The memory slowly seeps into Namaari’s head. All the bickering, the fighting… “you used to call her a mute druun, and she used to throw buckets of water over your head. Mother didn’t know what to do with the two of you.”

“Yes, yes, until a few young soldiers started picking on Jing too. I think at that point, I started realizing that I may or may not have feelings for her.”

“You chased all of them and taught them a lesson.”

Atitaya shrugs, setting a now sleeping chai down to sleep on the wooden crib near the door. “And then she made me a bracelet out of the metal bucket she’d always use to dump water over my head. She did it as an apology, so we gave each other a second chance. Now, we’re married, caring for two wonderful boys.”

“How did you know she was the right person for you?”

Atitaya arched a brow. “Why ask? Are you interested in someone?”

Namaari rebuffs. “N-no.”

“Really? Actually, I don’t ever remember you ever being with anyone besides Lien,” Atitaya remarks, coaxing a drooling Dao off of Namaari’s shoulder.

Namaari wipes the child’s drool off with the back of her hand. “I was with Lien for six seasons until she decided that being friends was for the better. Turns out, being friends didn’t work out either.”

It was a rough relationship.

Namaari had only started receiving more and more tasks because of the Druuns, and that had caused a strain. Lien was afraid of losing Namaari, and Namaari was just as scared of losing her own life… but her duty is her duty. She had explained that being the chief’s daughter meant accepting responsibilities.

Lien was opposed to that.

And that had been the reason everything eventually broke apart.

If it were up to Namaari, she would never have seen her face again, but Lien is part of the Fang soldiers. For the next two years, Namaari worked alongside her. Or tried to. Lien would argue professionally at every turn of the way before turning the conversation into something sour and personal.

Virana eventually pulled Lien from the ranks because of it.

 _You let your work engulf you too much,_ Lien had told her that fateful night, _and when you have nothing left to hold on to, don’t run back to me._

Atitaya purses her lips.

“It happens sometimes.” Her voice sounds so low that Namaari could’ve missed it, “If you really want to know, though… Loving someone is different for everyone. For me, I fall for someone based off of the way they treat the people around me, but in general, if they’re all you can think about? Then maybe. If you look at them, and you can see a bright future with them. If you look at them and-and feel safe and everything you do doesn’t feel forced at all.

Even when things get tough, they’re all you can see. They’re the hope in your fears.” Atitaya halts her tirade for a heartbeat, “and more importantly, they’re the ones who encourage you to _become_ better.”

There’s a saying her mother tells Namaari.

 _Love isn’t easy,_ she would say, tapping Namaari’s nose, _but it should put you at ease in an already difficult world._

She tries to remember the last time she’s been at ease. The last time she’s felt safe. The last time she found herself forgetting about her worries and forgetting about her people; a moment in time where she really only thought about her own well-being and the person who made her feel safe.

She doesn’t have to think too long, but her blood rushes at the sudden memory.

In the middle of the flower field… with Raya.

_“Do you have any idea how many flowers you’ve killed by making this dumb flower crown?” Namaari tells her, agreeing to have it around her head anyway. “You’re a murderer to these little things.”_

_Raya’s laugh sounds like wind chimes. “They’ll grow back next wet season. I just need enough to make you look more approachable.”_

_She groans._

_Raya returns with flowers of a different variety. Some were white, some were purple, others blue, the rest were reds. She kneels right next to Namaari, close enough for their breath to mingle. “The stems aren’t long enough to tie together. But, they look really pretty, don’t they?”_

_There’s a moment’s notice right then and there._

_When Raya looks up from the flowers, Namaari saw it._

_The way light seeped and refracted into Raya’s dark, mirror-like eyes, turning them bright amber. Namaari’s used to them being darker than night itself; she’s used to seeing herself and nothing else besides that. But right now, at this moment, she could see the magic dancing behind them._

_Beautiful,_ she wants to say.

 _The dark is there to gratify the light,_ she thinks _._

_See, Namaari is strong. Namaari is defiant. Namaari can look deep into the pits of death’s eyes, bare her fangs, and spit at their feet. She’s brave, tactical, smart, resilient – Namaari burns hotter than wildfire, engulfing anyone in her path._

_But Raya moves like the ocean – stunning under the sun and still under the moonlight._

_And if Namaari had to choose between burning and drowning, she would much rather choose the latter._

_“Lay down,” patting her lap, Naamari tells Raya, “let me braid these flowers into your hair.”_

Her heart clenches in her chest.

“Princess?”

Namaari blinks the memory away. “S-sorry, I was lost in thought there.”

“I’ve given you much to think about,” Atitaya tilts her head. There’s no judgement there. It’s just a simple statement.

Namaari thinks about lying or changing the subject, but she knows Atitaya enough to know that she’ll simply shut that down. So, she gives her part of the truth. “Yes. I’ve just… realized I’ve never told anyone besides my mother that I love them.”

Atitaya shrugs. “Love comes easy to some people. Others? It takes time. A _long_ time.”

“You say it as if you know what it’s like.”

“Because it took me two years to tell Jing I love her, and it took your mother ten to tell your father.”

“Ten?”

“Yes,” Atitaya nods solemnly, “on his death bed.”

The day passed quickly after that.

Namaari’s failing to concentrate and power through her paperwork when Raya’s scribbled note is staring right at her face. She tries to tuck it away but stutters anyway when a passing thought of Raya crossed her mind; She wonders how she might be fairing on her courier duties in the middle of this wretched heat, considering the fact that she’s most definitely at the border between Tail and Talon right now.

Maybe Namaari should hide little notes for Raya to find as well.

Maybe she should leave some in Raya’s room for when she returns home.

Or maybe Namaari should just focus on her _damned_ work before doing anything else.

Namaari grits her teeth and pours in another hour just to get everything done. Her eyes strain and throb in annoyance from all the reading, and her hand cramps from all the signing and the writing. She stands up to reach for refreshments, groaning at the realization that she only had a third of a cup of water left.

Her eyes then fall to the vase on the far right of her refreshments table.

Well, a little bit of wine won’t hurt.

She reaches for a stout container, pouring the red liquid into her cup.

Her tongue retreats as the bitter taste fill her mouth, but she rolls through and around it, allowing the taste to settle before taking another heaving gulp. It tastes awful. Nothing like the wine she’s used to, and honestly, for all she knows, this could be poisoned. She can’t complain, though.

Beggars can’t be choosers.

She leans against the railing of her balcony to watch the stars glitter in the sky. A couple of dragons dance along the skyline, laughing amongst themselves.

She finishes her first cup quicker than she expected. She’s pouring the second one when she feels it.

A familiar eerie change in the air that tickles the back of her neck. Namaari’s quick to tense up. Her eyes fly around her space. Behind her, to the left, to the right, up above… and when her eyes flicker down, she notices Sisu’s tail.

Namaari sighs.

“Sisu.”

There’s a thump right below Namaari’s feet, a telltale sign of Sisu bumping her head against the crevice of the balcony.

Sisu slips out from below, claws gripping the railing that Namaari had just leaned against. “He-he-heyyy, what uh… what’s going on? I was just… sitting here. _Definitely_ not spying on you.”

Namaari raised her brow. She could go about this directly and ask Sisu about the spying part, but she’s too tired to even raise her voice at this point.

“How was the favor you did for Pengu?”

“Hm, what?” Sisu blinked.

“When you left Raya and me by the lake. You said you had to bring something to Pengu, and you left in _such_ a hurry. I didn’t even have the chance to say goodbye,” Namaari stirs the wine with her finger before taking another dollop of it down her throat.

The information suddenly clicks together in Sisu’s head. She throws her head back to say ‘ohhh’ before answering with a tight nod. “Yeah, Pengu liked it! I got him uh… a… sweater… from Spine..?”

Namaari makes a mental note to never trust Sisu to fake a cover-up story.

“You mean _Jagan_ liked the sweater you got him from _Talon_.” Namaari’s correction causes Sisu’s smile to twitch. “You know, if you’re going to lie, you might as well learn how to keep your story straight.”

Sisu chuckles nervously, but the pressure on Namaari’s hardened face causes her to drop it. “Ah, for the love of Kumandra,” the dragon gives in, “okay, yeah, I lied, but only cus’ Raa— _ooonly_ cus I needed to leave for personal reasons.”

It’s probably the wine at this point, but Namaari’s patience runs thin in her veins. Instead of pushing it, she finishes her cup before pouring herself another glass. Sisu wordlessly approaches from the balcony, pushing her snout to sniff at the red liquid.

Her nose visibly wrinkles. “Now what’s up with you? Drinkin’ like you ain’t got nothin’ else to drink.”

“Raya said ‘get more relaxing hobbies’, and wine happens to be relaxing,” Namaari comments.

“Pft, that’s no ordinary wine. That’s Nep Cam. Rice wine from Tail. And yeah, it’ll help you relax,” Sisu’s mane whisps around the air as she pads over to the foot of Namaari’s bed, “at the price of tomorrow’s headache.”

Namaari laughs, her vision blurring slightly as she sits into her desk again. Another sip, “Well, that explains how quickly it’s affecting me.”

Sisu snickers. “At least you’re safe at home.”

Namaari feels her skin start to burn. She looks at the Raya’s note on her desk, tracing a finger along each scribble. Rayla can’t right for _shit_ , but Namaari likes it anyway. “She’s cute, y’know?” Namaari thinks… says? Probably says. She’s not too sure she can think straight right now.

“ _Oh?_ ” Sisu raises a brow.

“Raya’s cute.” Namaari reiterates.

_No, Namaari, stop talking._

Sisu’s grin is wicked, and Namaari could see her trying to stop herself from bouncing around, tapping her little dragon feet. “I see, I see, and would you, I don’t know,” Namaari smiles at the way Sisu sings the words, “… get together with her?”

“Maybe.” Namaari rubs the edges of the note between her fingers, “she’s doing her own thing and I’m too busy to even make time for her. I don’t think it’ll work, also considering how I can come off a little too harsh. Maybe she secretly hates me.”

“Alright, now I think the wine’s getting to you,” Sisu approaches the jar and gives it a good sniff before turning it around. “Oh, boy… Hey uh, I think you missed one of Raya’s notes um..”

“Whad…Whatd’s it say?” she slurs.

“She added a little… _extra_ into it,” Sisu clears her throat, “wowee, no wonder you’re already way out of it. Isn’t that your third cup?”

There’s a moment of silence between her and Sisu, but Sisu nods? Is she nodding? Or is that the wine? Was _Namaari_ nodding? “I don’t know…” Did she just say that out loud?... No. Maybe?

She raises her cup to her lips again.

Huh, why does the wine suddenly taste like water?

Sisu quickly slithers closer to Namaari. “I didn’t see you two fight after… y’know, you killed me…”

“Oh, so you actually _did_ die. My bad,” Namaari mumbles.

“It’s fine, really! I was brought back to life, so no harm no foul. Good aim, though!” Sisu moves around again, her motion resembling a snake, almost. It’s pretty. How her scales just glow sometimes. “Raya told me she was really, really close to cutting off your head… She also told me how she’s happy she didn’t cus’ she got to see this part of you,” Namaari hums at Sisu’s words, “well, not this one in particular. I actually can’t wait for her to see _this_ side of you.”

“A-and besides,” Sisu quickly adds, swiping the drink away from Namaari, “you see her as much as you can, and she’s alright with it. I think she’s more concerned about you overworking yourself more than anything.”

“Hmm, like today?” Namaari shuts her eyes and feels the darkness churning at the back of her eyelids.

“To be honest, Raya sent me there to make sure you actually got some rest. I saw you talkin’ to that lady in the courtyard. She seems nice.”

Namaari winces when she tries to open her eyes. The swirling room is starting to give her a piercing migraine.

It’s as if Sisu knew what was happening. The next thing Namaari realizes is that the dragon pushes her snout over one of her arms. Namaari tries to walk a straight line but fumbles along the way; Sisu catches her every single time. She moves languidly, almost like swimming except slower.

Even the details of her own room is… blurred.

The minute her knees hit the bed, she falls over, face first into the bedsheet. When she tries to lift herself up on fours, her stomach turns. The world spins right then and there, and Namaari flips to her side, pulling at the covers.

Sisu grunts somewhere in the room and Namaari feels a weight resting over the blanket just by her feet. “Wow, you are _so_ going to regret this tomorrow,” she hears Sisu comment. “Really quick, ‘fore you pass out, did you drink enough water today?”

_No._

Namaari’s brows furrow as she turns again, ignoring Sisu’s question to favor the pounding in her head. She likes her lips, fiddling with the pendant around her neck.

_Why did Raya keep the pendant?_

_Why did Namaari keep the hair cuff?_

“I think I like her,” Namaari’s words are languid, definitely, but she’s sure of it.

There’s movement followed by a sigh. “You should tell her that when you’re not like this.”

Namaari huffs.

“Maybe,” is all she could say before the world around her turned black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PS: I wrote the drunk Namaari part while I was drunk for full effect.
> 
> If there are typos specifically in that area, lmk, cus i do NOT beta read lmaoooo


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